Are You A Parent Of A Screenager? Is Your Parenting Skill Enough To Deal With Them?

Imagine this: your child, head bent over a glowing screen, fingers tapping furiously, lost in a world of stories, friends, reels, and games. You call them to the dinner table—no response. You remind them again—still no reaction. Frustrated, you raise your voice, and they reply with irritation or a cold shrug. If this sounds familiar, welcome to the world of parenting a screenager—a teenager growing up in the age of screens.

In this digital era, parenting is no longer what it used to be. While love, care, and guidance remain timeless pillars of raising children, the methods and approaches need a serious upgrade. With the rapid rise of technology and social media, today’s adolescents are shaped by a reality vastly different from what most parents experienced in their own youth. The pressing question is: Are your parenting skills equipped for the screenager generation?

Who Are Screenagers? The term screenager refers to today’s teens (and even pre-teens) who spend a significant portion of their lives in front of screens—be it smartphones, tablets, computers, or television. They are digital natives, born into a world of instant messaging, Instagram reels, YouTube shorts, video games, and online classrooms.

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These young minds are growing up in an environment saturated with information, entertainment, and social validation—all delivered instantly through a glowing screen. While technology has its perks—access to knowledge, creativity, and connectivity—it also presents serious challenges that are shaping the lives of screenagers in unprecedented ways.

Key Features of the Screenager Generation

• Tech-Savvy but Vulnerable: Screenagers are highly skilled in navigating devices and platforms. However, they often lack the emotional maturity to handle the psychological effects of excessive screen time, online feedback, or digital comparison.
• Addicted to Instant Gratification: A few seconds of delay in loading a page can frustrate them. They’ve grown accustomed to fast results—likes, views, wins, and entertainment—leading to reduced patience and attention span.
• Social Media-Driven Identity: For many screenagers, self-worth is closely linked to digital likes, comments, and followers. This virtual validation shapes how they see themselves, which can be both empowering and damaging.
• Emotionally Isolated: Despite being constantly connected, many screenagers experience loneliness, anxiety, and depression. Face-to-face conversations are being replaced by texts and emojis, limiting emotional expression and connection.
• Blurring Lines Between Reality and Virtuality: With filters, curated posts, and influencer lifestyles, screenagers often develop unrealistic expectations about life, relationships, and success.

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Impact of the Screen Culture on Young Lives The consequences of excessive screen exposure are becoming increasingly evident:

• Mental Health Concerns: Studies have shown a rise in anxiety, depression, sleep disturbances, and low self-esteem among screenagers.
• Reduced Academic Performance: Constant digital distractions often interfere with concentration, study routines, and learning abilities.
• Social Disconnection: The quality of peer interactions has declined, with many teens struggling with in-person communication and emotional regulation.
• Risk of Online Exploitation: Cyberbullying, exposure to harmful content, and digital predators are growing threats in the lives of young internet users.
• Physical Health Effects: Eye strain, poor posture, reduced physical activity, and obesity are common among children glued to screens.

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So, What Should Parents Do? If your current parenting strategies aren’t working, it’s not your fault. But it’s your responsibility to adapt. The world has changed, and your parenting must evolve too. Here are some practical, research-backed tips to help you navigate parenting in the digital age:

1. Don’t Be a Screen-Phobic Parent—Be a Screen-Savvy One: Instead of outright banning or constantly criticizing screen use, take time to understand what your child is doing online. Show curiosity, not judgment. Watch their favorite shows or play their favorite games together occasionally. This opens doors for healthy conversations and trust.
2. Establish Tech Boundaries, Not Power Struggles: Set clear rules on screen time, but involve your child in the process. Co-create a digital usage plan—decide screen-free zones (like during meals and before bedtime), acceptable content, and daily time limits. When children feel heard, they are more likely to follow rules.
3. Encourage Real-World Connections: Help your child find joy outside the screen. Enroll them in art, music, dance, or sports. Organize outdoor family time—walks, travel, or even gardening. Reinforce the value of face-to-face bonding.
4. Talk About What Matters Most—Feelings, Not Just Behavior: Instead of scolding for “too much phone time,” ask what they enjoy about being online. Are they feeling left out when they don’t check messages? Are they comparing themselves with influencers? Understanding the why behind their behavior helps you parent with empathy.
5. Be a Role Model: Children learn more from what we do than what we say. If you’re scrolling through your phone during dinner or checking emails constantly, they will do the same. Model balanced screen behavior and mindful tech use.
6. Build Emotional Resilience: Teach your child to cope with stress, rejection, and peer pressure without escaping into the screen. Encourage journaling, open conversations, problem-solving, and relaxation techniques.
7. Stay Informed and Evolve: Technology will continue to evolve, and so should your awareness. Stay updated on new apps, trends, and digital threats. Attend parenting workshops, read about digital wellbeing, and share insights with other parents.
8. Create a Safe Space for Conversations: If your child makes a mistake online or gets into trouble, avoid blame. Be the parent they can turn to—not the one they fear. Discuss topics like cyberbullying, sexting, privacy, and digital footprints with openness.

Upgrade Your Parenting, Not Just the Software Screenagers are not “spoiled” or “lazy”—they are simply navigating a world filled with temptations, pressures, and possibilities that we never had to face at their age. Our job as parents is not to fight technology but to raise emotionally healthy, responsible digital citizens. So, the next time you see your child absorbed in a screen, don’t just shout from the kitchen.

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Sit beside them. Ask what they’re watching. Start a conversation. That small step could be the beginning of a deeper connection—and a smarter way of parenting. Because in this digital age, it’s not just about raising children—it’s about raising them right.

(Dr Raheemudheen PK is a licensed Clinical Psychologist working under the Department of Health Services, Government of Kerala. He is currently with the Government Mental Health Hospital, Thrissur. He has an experience of more than 10 years in the field of mental health and rehabilitation. He held the position of Co-Chair of UNESCO chair on Community-Based Disability Management and Rehabilitation Studies during 2020-2021.)